Well, we all know that teenage years can be some of the hardest years in our lives. These are some of the most rough, exciting, fun and low times for every one. Whilst our children are figuring out their identities, parents, educators and mentors are completely involved with how to make their child achieve their full potential and utilize these very crucial years for them to become successful and happier in the long run. As hard as this may be a truth to accept, these are some of the most emotionally draining years for everyone in the family. There are clashes, arguments and heat. Now, how we propose you deal with the same, at least in terms of your child’s academic life is discussed below.

Motivation may not always be in the language of praise, involvement is the key!

Overly optimistic behavior and sudden and frequent behavior may challenge your child’s psychology in a negative way. This can cause emotional distance and detachment issues. Adding to the same, this may also add as a shock to the already delicate trust of your ward and henceforth cause little to no hope for communication. Now, having discussed what not to do, let us talk about what we should do instead of immediate praise. It is ‘involvement’. Teenagers are often conflicted about which age group they belong to. Very frequently we are faced with the generic, “Am I a child or an adult?” question. To motivate a teenager, involvement in important family matters and valuing their opinions is essential and this also leads to an increased self esteem, in the mind of a very emotionally fragile teenager.

The incentive and collateral

When all methods of motivation seem futile, try the incentive based method. Using phrases and techniques like, ”let me make you a deal” and “what was our agreement” go a long way. What this method does to improve productivity is, one, instill the thought that nothing in this world comes for free, which will eventually prepare our children for the challenges that life will throw at them in the near future. Two, this method builds competitiveness and a sense of gamifying tasks. For instance, if your child is lagging in academics due to an unattached nature, they can be motivated through incentivizing their efforts, just like an analyst would be working overtime just around the festive bonus time.

Follow through, but NO pestering!

When you’ve assigned your teenager with a task, always follow through using firm yet friendly parenting and mentoring techniques. “What was our deal?” goes a long way with kids. They get motivated and the instant adrenaline to perform a task with or without the will. When we mention without will, well, some tasks are just plain mundane, for instance turning in an assignment, mowing the lawn or simply cleaning their rooms. Teenagers can be messy and they need one little push which takes them a long way. Henceforth, this technique can be a very useful tactic to deal with teenage cribbing.

Communicate and plan

Teenagers need guidance and direction. Parents and mentors have the very crucial responsibility of communicating with them as freely as possible to help them make decisions which will have a very lasting impact in their life. For starters, we need to start listening to what our children want from life, understand their aspirations, goals and understand their needs and wants. Once that has been done, we need to be open about our expectations too. Once both parties have laid their propositions, they need to work through their distance as extensively as possible so that a mutually agreed upon outcome can be produced. Moving forward, parents and mentors should help teens design their schedules in a way to achieve their goals to as close proximity as possible.

Lastly, remember NO nagging!

Most teenagers are already on the verge of an emotional breakdown, well, at least I have known many like myself. With already conflicting emotional and mental obstacles, the last thing they need is banter from their parents, family and mentors. Instead we should help them create a roadmap for their short and long term goals which will help them navigate through their life choices carefully and also help them plan things accordingly. No one likes banter, and I’m positive that a teenager would not be happy about the same too.